Adoption: for families, and for later in life.

Hoping to adopt

Adoption needs families as much as it needs brave birth mothers. If you live in the islands and hope to adopt, there are three roads, and they are very different.

• Nearly everyone needs a home study. In Washington a favorable home study has to be on file with the court before a child can be placed with you, unless you are a stepparent. A private one costs about $1,000 to $3,000, according to the federal guide, and the state does its own at no charge for families adopting from foster care.
• Ask about the islands first. Not every agency serves San Juan County. Antioch Adoptions, for example, takes adoptive families only from King, Pierce and Snohomish counties. Ask each agency whether it will do a home study here, and how.
• Know what you may pay. Washington law lets an adopting family pay the medical costs of the pregnancy and birth, and legal fees and court costs. The law names only those costs, and paying for a child is a felony. If you are asked to pay for anything else, ask your attorney how it is approved.
• Know that it isn’t final at placement. A birth mother can take back her consent until a judge approves it, and the father’s rights have to be dealt with too. A baby placed with you before that could go back to his or her parents.
• Only licensed help. In Washington only the state, a licensed agency, or a family with a favorable home study may advertise to adopt. The state keeps a list of child-placing agencies.

Cost figures are from a federal guide dated June 2022.

Adopting from foster care

• Start with the state. Washington requires a foster license before you can adopt a child from foster care. Call 1-888-KIDS-414, or join one of the state’s online information sessions, held on the first Tuesday of each month.
• How many are adopted. The state says 654 children and youth were adopted from foster care in Washington in 2024.
• Alongside, formerly the Northwest Adoption Exchange, connects licensed families with young people in foster care who are waiting for a family: 206-441-6822.
• AdoptUSKids is the federally funded national listing of children waiting for families: 888-200-4005.
• Support afterward. For children with special needs adopted from foster care, Washington’s Adoption Support program can provide health coverage, counseling and a monthly payment.

Help with the cost

• The federal adoption tax credit is up to $17,670 per child for 2026, and part of it is refundable. The rules are detailed, so read the IRS page or ask a tax preparer.
• Your employer may offer adoption benefits, and the IRS lets up to $17,670 of them be excluded from your income in 2026. Ask your human resources office.
• Military families can be reimbursed up to $2,000 per child, or up to $5,000 a year, for adoption expenses, according to the federal guide.

Honoring your child’s first family

Your child will always have two families. Treat the first one with respect.

• Keep your promises about contact. In a study that followed birth mothers for up to 20 years, the mothers who struggled most were those whose contact had stopped. In Washington a contact agreement is enforceable when it is written into the court order, and breaking it never undoes the adoption. Keep it because it is right for your child.
• Tell the story truthfully, early and often, and speak of your child’s birth parents with respect.
• Use words that honor the decision. She “made an adoption plan” or “placed” her child. She did not “give up” a baby.
• Know when to get help. Most children who are adopted do well. In a Minnesota study of teens adopted as babies, most were psychologically healthy. They also had about twice the odds of a behavior disorder and of having seen a mental health professional, and about four times the odds of a reported suicide attempt. The behavior differences were larger for teens adopted within the United States. Take any talk of self-harm seriously: call or text 988. Getting help early is good parenting.

Years later: records and reunion

• Original birth certificates. At 18, a person who was born in Washington and adopted can ask the Department of Health for a copy of the original birth certificate. It is released unless a birth parent has filed a form refusing, and that form expires when the birth parent dies.
• Contact preferences. A birth parent can file a contact preference form, free, saying whether contact is welcome, should go through an intermediary, or is not wanted, and can change it at any time. A medical history form goes with it, so that family health information reaches the child.
• A birth parent’s own copy of the original certificate costs $15.
• Finding each other. Washington has no central reunion registry. Once the adopted person is 21, he or she, or a birth parent, can ask a court to appoint a confidential intermediary. WARM, the Washington Adoption Reunion Movement, has done this work since 1976, exchanges names only when both sides agree, and charges $200 to $400 for a search: 206-767-9510.

The Department of Health’s adoption records office is at 360-236-4300, and requests are taking about two months. Fees are as of November 2026.

Stories worth hearing

• BraveLove publishes birth mothers’ stories: bravelove.org/stories.
• The National Council For Adoption has three birth mothers describing open adoption: Birth Mom Experiences in Open Adoption.
• Antioch Adoptions shares stories and videos, including some from birth mothers: Stories & Videos.

Thinking about adoption for your own baby? Start with Adoption: a loving choice.